My Story of Guns

Over the past week or so, I have said a lot of things about firearms, and our social relationship to them. I believe it is pretty clear and obvious where I stand on the issue, though I have not gone to the lengths of laying out my personal policy hopes. I am not going to do that here, either. Before I could ever go to those lengths, I think I should tell you my story. At times, I have mentioned parts of it, I have teased that I was once on the other side of the conversation, but I have not given the full account of how I have arrived where I am.

It was not all that long ago that I owned firearms. While I grew up in a small town, and did some hunting, I was never much of the sportsman. I enjoy being outside, and I enjoy seeing and experiencing the wonder of God’s Creation while camping. I know how to hunt, and can do so when either I am invited or if I were forced to. However, it is not a passion where I choose to spend my time and finances. 

Because of that, most of the firearms I owned were handguns. I bought them because at that time I believed I needed them to protect myself. I internalized all the narratives of how police do not stop crime, but only show up after it has occurred; that if I were to find myself in a situation where someone wanted to take my life, I would be the only resource I had to defend it. I went and took the class, got the background check, submitted the fees, and received my concealed carry permit. I had all the gear I would need. I spent my money on a good holster and belt, carried a spare magazine, and focused my senses into “the combat mindset”

It was partially because of that mindset, however, that I finally decided to disarm myself. 

I found myself seeing the world through a set of lenses the did not match the Gospel.

For those who are unaware, the combat mindset is the most important part of being effective in armed self-defense. You can have a gun, and be a good shot, but if you don’t have your mind in the right place, you will be caught unawares, and unable to defend yourself. Or, so the philosophy goes. It is the mindset, more than any skill, that separates the sheep from the sheepdog in the eyes of concealed carry enthusiasts. It is a tool that can not be purchased, and requires constant attention.

The combat mindset is a set of conditions that one must interact with on a constant basis. It starts with the premise that active awareness is what separates people capable of effective defense from those who become victims of violence. The firearms writer and instructor, Jeff Cooper, adapted it from the United States Marine Corps, and applied it to everyday life. There are four stages denoted by colors, and if you want a full explanation, you can type the term into google where pages of results, including videos, will be presented to you. I would just like to focus on why I believe that mindset does not cohere to the Gospel.

When I lived by the mindset, getting my mind focused was part of my morning routine. In order to fully capture the idea that, “I might have to shoot someone today,” I had to meditate. It was not a natural state for me to walk though life like that. I am someone who loves people and finds great joy in meeting new people. It is one of the qualities that others notice in me, and it is one of the qualities that I like about myself.

I like being known as a friendly person.

When I lived by the mindset, I would not have described myself as a friendly person. It is not to say that I was angry or hateful, but I did not engage with people as freely as before or since I stopped carrying a gun. In the mindset, you are meant to see strangers in the world as possible aggressors, measuring up and assessing the possible threats constantly. Your inner monologue describes others as “targets” because it is easier to shoot a target than a person. It weighs the value of the lives around you, and your life is always the most valuable. 

It is an inherently self-centered philosophy.

Therefore, it is an inherently Non-Gospel ideology.

I stopped carrying a gun, in part, because I realized that I was beginning to see targets, and not human beings. People were no longer created in the image of God, to me, but instead possible opponents that might have to be put to death. It was isolating and lonely for me to see the world through such a lens. I thought I was the only real thing around, except for those few who I actually had relationships with. But that was a problem because I was not creating any new relationships because I did not know any actual people. I was just interacting with “targets.”

I finally grew too lonely.

I finally realized I was no longer human myself.

In Colossians, Paul says that the fullness of God dwelt in Christ, bodily, and that when we were raised in baptism, we were raised in Christ. I take this to mean that when we relate to one another, we are, in essence, relating directly to God as well. Maybe it is what is meant when the Quakers speak of Inner Light. But when I was trapped in an ideology that caused me to see the world as potential threats instead of as image bearers of God, I was also suppressing that same image inside myself. I was not living as I was created to live, but instead allowing myself to be captive to a philosophy created by someone else. 

It is for this very reason that I have been so vocal these last few days. It is not just the violence and death created by a culture that worships and idolizes firearms. It is not just the infection of the passion of teenagers who after surviving horror decided enough is enough. It I not just the horrible things being claimed as a part of God that have no business in God’s Church. Though, it should be noted that all of things exist and I recognize them in myself. 

My main motivation is that I believe gun culture makes us less human, and not more.

I certainly was.

This Is What Theology Looks Like

In the early and middle parts of the twentieth century, there were numerous professional theologians who graced the covers of national magazines. Their voices were regularly sought out to discuss the condition and future of society because they were seen as public voices who spoke not only wisdom, but carried with them the voice of large communities. It is one of the reasons that in the wake of the death of the Rev. Billy Graham that all of the retrospectives highlight his relationships with presidents. These men, and they were mostly if not all men, were considered intellectual participants in our national dialogue.

Today, many tend to mourn what they perceive as a lack of public theology. There is a recognition that the Church has ceded the ground in our public discourse and that theology is no longer done in public. Theologians are barred from the room where the conversation of our society is taking place, and we are all the poorer for it. You will never see another Reinhold Niebuhr on the cover of Time Magazine, and you will never find another MLK leading a national movement for justice. It would seem that theology is dead, as far as our national discourse is concerned. 

This is not true, however.

Theology is not just an academic discipline, though there are people, like myself, who have academic degrees in it.

Theology is what we do when we talk about God. 

Anyone can do that, even if they don’t know the fancy terms.

While we could also discuss that there are public voices for theology, like Russell Moore, Robert Jeffress, and Franklin Graham, there are others doing theology in public on a daily basis that I would like to address in this post. Yesterday, at the annual Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC), Wayne LaPierre Jr., executive vice-president of the NRA, did theology from the podium. Most probably do not consider it theology, but that is exactly what it was. He may not have talked about God’s providence, the condition of humanity, or his conception of Christology, his words were nothing other than theological.

During his speech, Mr. LaPierre, said that the right to own a firearm was not created by humans, but ordained by God and part of our American birthright.

That is a theological statement.

Such words imply that not only God’s preference for firearms, but a national preference of America over other countries. 

To unpack a bit, the theological perspective of Mr. LaPierre is that God likes guns, and God wants you to have a gun. This not an implication of his words, but instead a direct application. He isn’t trying to rhetorically insert a theological perspective into his speech, but evoke a religious response concerning the right to own a firearm. That is what theology does. Spoken in public, it calls us towards the work of God in the world. And in that light, Wayne LaPierre is doing theology in public.

Theologies, though, are not prescriptions for how we are to work in the world, though they are often used as such. Theologies, because there are many, are actually descriptions of how we believe God is working in the world. They were created by human beings, and they represent the perspectives of their creators. Finite, fallible human beings have always attempted to understand their infinite God, and when they try to explain that in public, it becomes theology. When we think theology comes down from heaven is when we begin to have some problems.

Theology in public is powerful. Mr. LaPierre knows that.

We know it is powerful because every political speech ends with some version of, “God bless you, and God bless the United States.” If Mr. LaPierre did not believe that people would respond to references to God, he would not have included them in his speech. But we must contend with the fact that there is more than one theology in our public sphere. Some of those theologies directly rebut the position of the NRA.

Mr. LaPierre is expressing a theology that lacks in Biblical interaction. 

When Jesus was to be arrested, Peter attempted to defend him with his sword. After cutting off a Temple guard’s ear, Jesus tells him, “He who lives by the sword will die by it.”

The Old Testament prophets had a hope for a world reconciled to God where the people would, “beat their swords into plow shares, and their spears into pruning hooks.”

It should be noted that Scripture often shifts our focus towards talking about the end times, or eschatology. Some will instantly think, “We will never have that world of plow shares and pruning hooks until Jesus returns.” I’m not going to re-litigate a theological discussion I have written about before. What I will say, however, is that we need to recognize that theology is being done in public.

Wayne LaPierre did it yesterday. 

Someone is going to do it tomorrow.

What we need is more theology in public and private. We need to see that none of these theologies should be lifted up to the same level of importance as God…or to the Bible. We made those theologies, just like we made those guns. We can change those theologies. While there are, of course, conversations to be had concerning orthodoxy, we are not trapped into a theology.

Theology is not monolithic.

Theology is for everyone.

You Are Right, The World Needs Jesus

I hear your words, and I see what you write. You, like all of us, are trying to cope with the deep pain and suffering that seems all too commonplace in our society. More people are dead with no good explanation, and as we are trying to have a collective moment of deciding where to go from here, you want to participate. There are many voices, all talking about different possible futures, so your voice is welcome. There should be no limits to who gets to participate in how our society forms its tomorrow.

It is good that you are speaking.

I want you to speak.

You offer that the real problem is that the Gospel is lacking. You recognize that the Church is not as prominent in our culture as it once was. Attendance is down. Churches are closing. Money is tight. We are graduating seminarians into a world where there are not ministries for them to serve. It does not look good for the future of the Church in America. I get your apprehension of what the future may hold.

To address our collective pain, you offer that what we really need is more Gospel. I hear you when you say, “Evil is real presence in this world, and only the Gospel can correct that,” or, “This kind of evil can only be corrected with the return of Jesus. Until that happens, nothing will change.”

And you know what? I agree with you.

I am a believer in the redeeming work of Jesus, and the healing power of God’s grace. I have staked my life and my financial future on them. You are absolutely correct that these things make a real difference in the world. I defend my faith with all the strength I have because I believe it is life giving. I have seen how God can make people whole, and can change the world for the better.

But do not let this belief in the healing power of the Gospel be an excuse to do nothing.

I get that there is fear about how to address our collective future, and I agree that it can be difficult to wade into the controversial waters of gun control. While I affirm that the world would be better with more Gospel and not less, pushing off any attempt at social correction in preference for an eschatological reset is not the answer. Such sentiments sound as a way to wrap your unwillingness to confront social injustice in Jesus and bury it beneath the alter of indifference.

That is not a Christ-like response.

When Jesus was confronted with the woman caught in adultery, his response was not to as for her to make a personal commitment to Christ.

He didn’t walk past the leper or the man born blind because disease is just a condition of a depraved Creation.

He didn’t leave Lazarus in the tomb for the Second Coming.

Maybe it is because we have developed a new definition of the Gospel that focuses on prayers and decisions instead of action. We have decided that is more important for people to walk the aisle and be baptized in order to put money in our offering plates than to go out and work for “the Kingdom come.”

You are right that we need more Jesus in the world. It does make a difference in people’s lives, everyday. It was the Social Gospelers of the late nineteenth and early twentieth centuries that brought us the Progressive Era of the 1930s-1940s, giving us Social Security so the elderly would not live in poverty. It was the Gospel which motivated Dr. King to work tirelessly, until he was assassinated, to help not only African-Americans, but all Americans see a world of justice and equality. 

While you are right that we need more Gospel, I will not accept such a Gospel that allows inaction.

Both Isaiah and Micah have the image of “swords into plowshare and their spears into pruning hooks.” There is something about these images from the prophets we must capture. It is the people themselves who lay down their arms. God doesn’t take them away. In those prophecies, when people come to God, they are the ones who destroy their weapons.

So, I still agree.

We need more Gospel.

We need one with enough power to put us to work.

You Were Right, It Is A Tool

A letter to those who coached me about guns:

You said it to me so many times. Whenever someone would advocate for more gun control, it was right there on the tip of your tongue. “A gun is just a tool. If we regulate that, we have to regulate hammers or axes.” Nevermind that some tools are regulated, like knives, welding equipment, blow torches, or spray paint. I know what you meant. You meant that the gun is just an instrument, and therefore not the problem. The gun was made by human beings to help us do things easier. We are the great tool makers after all. When we have a task to perform, we make tools so those tasks will be easier. Inherently, a tool has no inclination towards good or evil. It is but an inanimate object with the only value that which we imprint upon it.

And you said this to me often. You told me that when I had reservations about owning them. So, I took your rationale and I bought some tools for myself. And because certain tools are created for certain jobs, I bought different kinds. I had them for hunting birds, deer, and protecting myself. Because I believed you when you told me it was a tool, I even went the step of keeping my tools with me at all times, cause you never know when the job will come along where I will need that tool. Like the lug wrench I keep in my vehicle when I have to change a flat, or the screwdrivers to fix a door, I made sure my tools were all in working order. And because using the tool is a task that you have to learn, I practiced using them. Often, I did that with you because it was you who introduced me to those tools.

Though I was never a professional who used his tools on a daily basis, I was pretty good with my tools. Like the friend who can help you change out the light fixture, or do some minor car repair, I was the shade tree tool guy. My skills would do in a pinch cause I knew what I was doing with those tools. I knew who to clean them, care for them, and when I practiced, I punched the centers out f a lot of targets with those tools, and could bring down a lot of birds and other game. I was even the one you started to call when you thought about getting new tools for yourself. The friends who you bounced ideas off of to make sure you weren’t wasting your money on those tools.

You were right. I concede that the gun is just another tool, built to make the work of humans easier.

But, the work is different. A gun wasn’t made to build a house like a hammer. It wasn’t made to fix broken machines like a wrench.

The work of a gun is to kill. And if that is your work, it is the right tool for the job.

No other tool can run up the death toll like we have seen in just the first two months of 2018 like a gun. It should be a testament to the tool makers for no other tool is as effective at its job as a gun. I have seen lots of people miss nails with their hammer, or ruin screws with their screwdrivers. But no one who is wanting to kill is ineffective when they have a gun. Sure, sometimes they might miss their target, but when they hit, the job is done. 

There is no tool as effective at its job, nor dispassionate. 

These tools with no inherent good or evil don’t care where they do their work. They just do it with gusto. The list of animals hunted to extinction shows the potency of this tools work. I’m sure if you could find a rhino to tell you the story, they would let you know just how effective that tool has been. Though, you might want to hurry. I hear there are not many left to give such discerning details. 

If you can’t find one, why don’t you ask the students who have attending one of the 19 schools where this tool has made its presence known. Or you could ask the people of Las Vegas, or Charleston, or Virginia Tech…you know what I mean. You probably don’t need to ask though, cause you know how effective a tool it is.

You were right that the gun is nothing more than a tool. A dispassionate dispenser of the work of death. That is what it was made for, and it is very good at its job. 

So, I understand why you don’t like it when people start talking about “gun control.” Those ignoramuses are stupidly put restrictions on tools. It is not the tools fault that they are good at what they do.

That being the case, what if we started calling it “death control?” You see, I agree that it is a tool, and it is silly to regulate tools. Instead, why don’t we regulate the work. We just don’t want more people to die, and so what if we proposed omnibus policies that helped curb the harsh reality that people die needlessly in this country?

We wouldn’t be talking about the tools anymore.

We would be focused on the job.